Warri boys letter to President Jonathan on ASUU strike. Hilarious!!

Oga President:

First of all I hail ooo! I no say u no dey cary last. You be confirm warri pikin. But ur middle name Ebele means mercy and make u pity ur children settle their lecturers naa! The matter neva tire u? Suppose say ur pikin wey u born for belle follow us dey house, Sheeh you for never answer our we lecturers them? Una say make we bone kidnapping, militant things and all the bad bad things go enter school, now now na una com dey f**k up. 

All the things wey them lecturers don teash us for klass we don forget am finish. Last last, na una go still call us half-baked;half-roasted, abi na half-fried. Na una sabi.
Them talk say person no fit run pass him shadow. We go dey lasgidi dey for you. Na ur time be dis use am well, but we go catch you for 2015. U don forget say youths na we dey vote pass. Na we too dey snatch ballot box, dey do rally and som kain kukere things them wey them dey take win election. U go still nid our help. That time too we go go strike. Shebi u sabi waka for bare feet, u go carry ur leg do ur rally. No thugs for u. We no go snatch ballot make you for win. If any maga try am we go fall am.

So Oga Jona, na ur opportunity be dis ooo. Make u code this stubborn ASUU make dem cary their wahala goback. We no say na rush them go rush us we no send. All join. Na who get leg dey pass exam no be who read. Na still who get leg dey get beta work. Na Naija we dey. So make u do something because our mate dem for private university don graj finish. We don tire to dey beef them. If u no shake bodi fast make u no forget say university of militancy still dey admit. Dey neva release 2nd batch ooo!
"May u grit maale Patience for we, thank baba God say she and gran papa Soyinka don settle that their quarrel, 2 agbayas, plus all those bad belle advisers wey u get. God pass them! Bros Amaechi still dey Niger-delta here, the guy don tire for ur mata. We dey grit u for am too. We go stop for here. E go be na. Naija! student for life!

Na ur waffi boy

thenigeriangazette